Well, I’m 28 today. Turning 28 is pretty wild to think about, because in my mind I still feel like I’m 22. At the same time, though, I absolutely love the way I feel about myself at this age. I’m more at peace with myself than I’ve ever been before, and – I know I said this last year – but I am the happiest I’ve ever been.
My current state of happiness is the result of learning some tough lessons over the past 28 years. I truly believe that everything in life happens for a reason, and that statement proves itself to be true with every year that passes and with every new season of life I enter. So, here you go. Here are 28 things I learned by age 28.
- Enjoy your own company. You spend more time with yourself than you spend with anyone else, and you need to love the time you’re spending with yourself. I absolutely LOVE hanging out and watching Netflix… alone. I am my own best friend, and it took me a while to reach that point.
- If people don’t like you, especially when you know deep in your heart that you’ve done nothing to them, that says more about them than it does about you.
- “Friends” are not supposed to talk crap about you behind your back. They are supposed to support you in your business ventures. Remember that.
- When people tell you who they are, believe them. This goes for friends, dating, anyone.
- Sh*tty friends will help you to appreciate great friends, and you will value the great friendship and cherish them so much more when you know what it’s like to deal with terrible friends in your life who don’t support you.
- Friends come and go, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Sometimes you just outgrow one another, and that is okay. With that being said, different chapters of your life will bring new people and you’ll wonder how you’ve gone your whole life without them.
- Just because you don’t need something out of a relationship doesn’t mean other people don’t need it, and vice versa (ex: giving gifts, words of affirmation, etc). I’ve learned about love languages, and the way that they apply to friendships as well. Different personalities communicate in different ways, and understanding this is extremely beneficial.
- You have to make sacrifices to get what you want in life, and this means saying no to social situations even when you don’t want to.
- With that being said, stop being a people pleaser. If you don’t want to do something, just don’t do it. It’s okay to say no to ANYTHING you don’t want to do. Going back to lesson number one, if you enjoy your own company, this will be very easy to do.
- Try your very best not to worry about what other people think – especially if it has anything to do with your job/how you’re making an income. Other peoples opinions won’t pay your bills.
- Having multiple streams of income is not only smart financially, but it’s good for your mind to build different skill sets and stay busy.
- With that being said, always be working on yourself. Listen to personal development podcasts whenever you can, and read a few pages from personal development or self-help books before bed each night.
- Eating healthier is great for your mental health. Junk food will only continue to fuel anxiety and depression that will get you no where in life. Starting to monitor what you’re putting into your body is beneficial in way more aspects than you may think.
- When it comes to dating, f*ckboys will hurt you, but they will teach you to be so appreciative when you actually meet a stand-up guy who treats you right and makes you feel the way you deserve to feel.
- YOU SHOULD HAVE WORN YOUR RETAINER AFTER YOU GOT YOUR BRACES OFF IN HIGH SCHOOL. Now you need Invisalign as an adult. Way to go.
- You also should have worn more sun screen. Now you have sun spots all over your face and have spent a fortune on expensive skincare to try to get them to go away. Once again, way to go.
- Donating items to Goodwill, Salvation Army, or listing items on Poshmark will not only be beneficial for the people who need/want your clothing, but it will also help you clear out some space in your closet and de-clutter your room, which with help with your anxiety. Focus on de-cluttering all the time, and actually take the time to do it. (***I still need to work on this one).
- Speaking of anxiety, don’t be afraid to talk about it. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and being more open about your struggles will allow people to better understand you and it will bring more awareness to the topic.
- Start putting money into your savings account as soon as possible. Even if you don’t think you can afford to do that… just do it.
- If there’s something you’ve always wanted to do, JUST DO IT. The only regret you’ll have is that you didn’t do it sooner.
- Try not to compare where you are in life to where other people are. Your timeline is your own, even though it’s easy to forget this sometimes.
- Your TRUE FRIENDS will cheer you on when you have great news.
- Understand the difference between being “nice” and being taken advantage of. People really will walk all over you, and it’s pretty incredible. If it happens once, don’t let it happen again.
- A wine night with your girlfriends solves a LOT of things. So does pizza, sweatpants, and a good cry sesh. Oh, and chinese food.
- Drink a water in between your alcoholic drinks when you’re out at bars. Chugging 5 vodka sodas and ripping 3 tequila shots is both frowned upon and unhealthy. And you will be hungover for a week afterwards.
- Fall in love with your body, but know there is nothing wrong with wanting to work on certain things. Do I love myself? Yes. Would I like a bigger booty, so I specifically told my personal trainer to help me achieve that? Also yes.
- You are slowly but surely becoming your mother.
- Sometimes you will desperately want closure from a situation, but you won’t ever get it. As hard and as painful as that is, there are some things in life we can’t control. We just have to move on and accept the fact that the apology will never come. It is what it is.
xo, Ashlen
Ps. You can shop for my comfy cozy pjs here.